catch and release

practice

new collage

Dipping into time, experiencing time differently lately, feeling both fully present and also this sense that time is moving beyond my grasp, feel an urgency to share my work, and also make new work purely for the time spent making it. This collage above is pieced together from images that were in a pile and for some reason wanted to be next to one another.

Discovering the What

 

Most often the only way I can discover the WHAT (i want to make, say, share, ultimately CREATE) is by somehow moving into that space, traveling through and reaching for what seems like it doesn't exist. Like right now, I'm writing and then erasing, writing and then erasing, writing and then erasing so much, like a dance that is tripping over its own feet. I am attempting to find the WHAT it is I am wanting to say. See this whole creating business is tricky. The only way I can discover WHAT it is I want to say under this image that says Step into discovering the WHAT is exactly that. 

There is no short cut to finding your creative WHAT, get on in.

sketchbook images

Today I am having troubles concentrating so I was looking through some sketchbooks. Oh, I love sketchbooks, can't seem to ever finish one without picking up a new one but I love them for the time spent drawing, writing, scribbling feels fresh and like today when I need a boost I can find something I did without too much thought and it brings me some joy again. Here are a few.

collages, one new one that's been hanging around

new drawings

 

 this is something I need to remember

3 inspirations recently

1.http://www.brainpickings.org/tag/neil-gaiman/
this talk by Neil Gaiman, story telling, and his voice, the actual sound to his voice soothes me.

2. Gorgeous illustrations from these two graphic novels.
Isabelle Aresenault, Jane,the Fox, and Me http://www.isabellearsenault.com/2yo0xb2on13tbjux8mio9w0mp0irbx
Love this blog - http://blog.picturebookmakers.com/post/122843304761/isabelle-arsenault

This One Summer
http://jilliantamaki.com/books/this-one-summer/

3. Dan Santat's Caldecott speech
http://www.ala.org/alsc/sites/ala.org.alsc/files/content/awardsgrants/bookmedia/caldecott2015-speech-lores_final.pdf

Big Lion Little Lion

SCBWI NJ conference- Thank You!

This weekend I went to the New Jersey SCBWI conference. This was the image I showed in the illustration show. When I learned about the theme for this year I got a bit huffy and puffy. 

Talked to my computer. More like complained.

"Ugh..., Once Upon a Time, I do not, do not, do not like it."

After a few days when the theme remained the same, I felt 

 my pencil, my computer, my sketchbook,  someone- something, was talking back. 

"So you don't like it, well what are you going to do about it?!" Somehow this was an invitation and a command at the same time. Turns out I can use my huffin' and puffin' to flip things around.

See ya later big bad wolf!

Thanks to NJ SCBWI for putting together an amazing weekend with so many opportunities to learn, connect, share with other illustrators and writers. Every time I sat down I met someone new and enjoyed hearing where they were on their children's book making journey. 

huge bonus-Thrilled to say that I won the pre-published illustrator award.

Here are is a link to see all the illustrations from the Once Upon A Time show.

https://kathytemean.wordpress.com/2015/06/20/illustrator-saturday-njscbwi-art-show-showcase/

Clues to when you are in the Making of something you really want to be making

Began this quick list one day in a notebook. I have been thinking about this lately, this sense that there are clues sometimes subtle sometimes overtly glaring in my veins, to when I am fully in the Making of something I truly want to be making. going to expand on this soon but for now...here are the few notes

sometimes

new illustration

eyes

did this ink drawing today. 

I like the way the pic looks all smoky eyes looking down looking up on u

3 inspirations this week

3 inspirations this week

1. If you want some creative mind heart opening juice to transform your life choices this is -A MUST listen http://unmistakablecreative.com/podcast/a-journey-to-the-crossroads-of-should-and-must-with-elle-luna

 2.My studio mate’s awesome beautiful embroidery book. I felt and witnessed her make it, week after week after week. I am so inspired and excited for her.

CHECK this beauty out.

http://www.rebeccaringquist.com/book/

3. I’ve been noticing little aaaaah yes, that is awesome weird how timely COINCIDENTAL moments also known as Synchronicities -the occurrence of two or more events that appear to be meaningfully related but not causally related. Synchronicity holds that such events are "meaningful coincidences". I LOVE synchronicity although it is hard to spell, I LOVE when those moments happen. It makes me feel like the universe is playing with me, guiding me, sending me little sometimes big signs to move in the direction, keep moving in the direction that makes me feel more ALIVE. Thank you synchronicity,,,,I invite you more.

18 minute collages

my ever growing changing scrap paper bin pictured above provides the juice 

for my 18 minute collages.

I stick my hand in an pull out voila---surprises, bits from sketches, drawings, watercolors.

I set my timer for 18 minutes then- cut glue go.

I love the creative process and could play with something endlessly.

However, these timed collaged give me the satisfaction and the practice of completing something.

Letting it be what it is and enjoying the imperfection, the not knowing, the making something.

try it. use what you have hanging around, set your timer, and see what you create.

sketchbook page

new illustrations

Have been drawing lots lately, filling many sketchbooks and then playing with the imagery.

These two are hot off my fingertips.

Enjoy a bowl of YUM

This morning my oatmeal tasted especially good. I actually heard my self go yummmmm. It may have actually somehow been extra tasty or that I was giving my bowl full attention. Wasn't reading, or checking email, or drawing. Soley enjoying what was in my bowl at that very moment. So satisfying. That bowl must have set a mood for the whole day because I seemed to enjoy everything else I was doing which was drawing, lots of drawing. My pencil went yum all the way down to the very last bit.

Whatever is in your bowl, I hope it makes you go yum too, even for a one glorious moment. 

connecting the heart from the inside out

                                                                     new illustration

mini sketchbooks

had some fun time in studio messing around with making mini sketchbooks 

(some rorschach watercolor blots)

could make these for days 

This guy is fast, but I'm not

wouldn't it be fun to be faster than a zebra driving a fancy car, or how about just being friends with a zebra. I love zebras. I love saying the word zebra. Collage above revisited today!

tell me a story

some drawing collage happening here

Something I forgot and now remember

In graduate school one of my painter teachers said this to me,

 "You are a good designer. You know how to place things. BUT DON'T DESIGN DANCE."

I don't remember what I thought when he said this but I have thought about it a lot, for over 14 years. Yup, it is one of those things that keeps rising up to tap me on the shoulder. Many times I thought I understood what he was saying only to later on realize I almost understood. Today, as I was working on an illustration for a picture book I'm working on, I remembered it again. Don't design Dance. It's ok to have a plan as to what you want to create, but let the  how come deep from within the act of letting your body do the making. Allow room for those beautiful surprises. Let the placing be like feet moving to your own rhythm. Let the image be a catcher for the making's dance.

Much easier said then done. Oh so much easier. There is a maker in me that sometimes has an idea, a grand idea, of how it should LOOK before it is made. This blocks all making magic. It also creates great frustration when the image never is able to meet those expectations.

Don't design Dance, doesn't mean, forget all about how it looks and will read, it means trust your lines, trust your hands, trust the making to place things as needed, as felt, as called to place and the image will definitely feel more alive and pulsing with freshness. Rest the thinking about how. In its place,

 get the hands moving, drawing, writing, gluing, moving toward that image that keeps shifting and grooving and pulsing with you to some how come to be. The image is that remnant, that evidence, that illustration of what when on when you were dancing.

Manifest Awesomeness

So, yeah!

I've been focusing my creative juices into manifesting what I want to manifest.

I say "It's simple" It's not REALLY that simple.

First you have to align your heart, mind, fingers, actions, with WHAT it is you want to create.

is it a book, an illustration, a blanket, a cape for superhero monkeys, What is the form?

Actually, Back up, FIRST you need to choose the feeling for the thing you want to create.  

the essence, the quality the thing evokes, the stuff that makes you go yes me likes this, 

Do you want it to be mysterious, surreal, eye popping bold, funny, entwined in story, abstract, 

what is the feeling?

then you mix the Physical Form with the Emotional Essence. 

You swirl it, bake it, toss it in a bowl and leave it under the moonlight for days, take it for a walk, bathe it, scrub it, hug it, lug it, shake it, plead with it, sing to it, feed it mountain ocean air, bow over it, 

ask it what you think may be unanswerable questions, sit with it, sit with it, sit WITH it, 

until something , that something you chose to make is sitting with you too.

essence to what you want to create +  form of what you want to create = Manifested Awesomeness

Wednesday's wondering, Vision Ball

I spend about 90 percent of my time wondering. My wondering comes in many forms and ways of being or creating. Sometimes this wondering happens with writing, or drawing, collaging, or walking on the way to somewhere I am walking. Lately my wondering has involved the topic of clarity. I notice this word lots in my journal, questions for picture books I'm working through, and even in a yoga class this morning. Clarity. Clarity. Clarity, ugh, I know I need to be specific, and ARTiculate what I want to create. But sometimes it is so hard to sift through all the swirling inside to find the vision that is truly mine.  Until I have the specifics on that one, I'm here now today clearing the space to refine align set tune my actions to meet this ever growing vision for my creations and ultimately my life. 

Voila! 

Shine Time Journal, Lilla Rogers Bootcamp

(the one i submitted)

(now: playing with new colors which i could do forever)

 

                                                 (sketches from the mini assignment)

I'm participating in Lilla Rogers illustration Bootcamp.

 I did it last year and really enjoyed it so i'm back for more exploring 

and working to create some fresh images.

One of the main reasons I like the Bootcamp is to use my skills and drawing love in new ways. This assignment was to create a journal cover with an Edwardian jewel inspired theme. This would be a dream job as I'm a notebook keeper. Have about 5 or more various idea, scribble, sketch book holders at one time. When I was making this journal I was thinking about an exercise I do often at night. It is to find the one moment in my day that for some reason delighted my whole being. It can be anything, that one second when I was writing and felt a word fly out onto the page without any effort, watching a woman in a red hat on the bus, spinning wildly in the snow with my dog and two boys and feeling completely immersed in something greater than myself, or eating a yummy soup. Sometimes that moment is easy to find, and other days I sift through the day to rediscover and acknowledge that one tiny shining moment that feels timelessly in tune with the life I'm continually creating.

to check out the other boot campers journals 

go to:

http://bit.ly/1ENeZR5

Power Pose

What would it feel to have done what I really want to do creatively?

I don't feel like waiting to find out.

So I'm conducting an experiment.

 I'm getting into my power pose and infusing a major victory vibe into my moment.

That's correct, riiiiiight now.My feet are grounded into this awesome earth,

 my arms reaching what they long to reach.

It's like a mid-morning snack. I'm fueling my day with WOW.

You can do it too.

Do your Victory DANCE NOW.

Love this Ted Talk by Ann Cuddy.

I've practiced this pose in kids yoga classes also.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ks-_Mh1QhMc